Many times people look down on you, people condemn you, people speak behind your back. i admit i used to be one of them, and im sorry. but now, i totally feel so right about what sister X told me. About how u really are like the 'child' of the kingdom of heaven (Matthew 18:1-9), so humble and willing to learn unlike those who are so full of themselves, thinking they deserve to be known as children of God more than you do, thinking they have all the knowledge of God and his will. I just think u can be more than what u are now. what i see is some one who wants to be heard, but at the same time listen to what others have to say too. But often, your actions put pple off because u portray yourself as defensive, closed, and arrogant. just wanna say that, u dun have to worry what people think about you cos' in the end, the person who really matters is Jesus. So what if they think you're a coward? so what if they think you're just nothing but a piece of crap? do what u think delights Jesus, and that matters.
Why does discrimination take place even in the christian community itself when we claim to always 'love our neighbours as ourselves'? do i discriminate? unfortunately yes. sometimes i ask myself. why then? going 'with the flow'? perhaps thats the best reason i can give. maybe at this point of my life. im still, as yt jie said, affected by how people view me. but as i said above, in the end what matters is how Jesus views me. sigh. still working towards it. i've gotta surrender to Jesus, to really live for him, not by words but by every move i make.
just pondering.. anyway, prelims are over!!
10:07 PM
blessed.
