i havent blogged for a week. thats really an indication of how busy i was for the past week. my life revolves around studies cca and ballet. and over and over again. cca..... was intense. you know, i always like to complain complain and complain abt my cca cos its just so dreadful. but again and again and again, God has been talking to me in different ways, echoing the words, ' I have my purpose for you...' somehow i wasnt convinced. but God is gracious. everything changed from the start of this year. Things started to pick up, i could see their commitment, i could see MINE. see, God is good.
That, meaning i have less time for other things in my life. Ballet is madness too. exams are in like 2 month's time and i just cant seem to remember my work. even when i could, my performance was just too horrible to comment on. the 2 weeks break during christmas season plus absence from my self-inflicted injury on my sole caused me not only to lose the momentum in me but also caused some excess weight to mysteriously appear. grr. now i have to watch my diet EVERYDAY. le qi just asked me the other day. 'dont dancers have to watch their diet?' i almost said no. until i rmb what ive becomed. argh. and my fitness and health is so failing me i can barely run round the track without panting. and, staying up for VARIOUS reasons (haha) almost got me oversleeping on the bus in the morning.
How am i supposed to survive???
the answer is simple. God.
Now today before GP lesson CLASS and i were sitting in the cafe, discussing abt some article in the straits time. It was a pro-atheist article. more like an argument for them. and then we started this discussion abt why must people have religion and stuff like that. well i know, its always hard to convince them why they need God, and why christianity is different. not taht i dun bother to explain it to them, but it takes a lot for them to understand what i mean. its things that you go through; its things that you see, well not physically, but perception of things rather. i was an atheist before too, its not hard for me to udnerstand what they feel. ANYWAY, my point is, there's no way, no way at all, for me to survive without God. oh and i rmb sthg they said like its all in the mind.. you know, like psychological. well. i would say even so, (if u ever experience God) you would find that the power of God is immeasurably greater than the person with the strongest will-power on earth. God has been using me to do things i never thought i could do. not because of what i can do, but because of His infinite power :)
Oh God, what have i done. let me feed your sheeps. let me love your people. let your people place themselves on the altar as a living sacrifice and worship to you. and may they be ever praising you.
O LORD, our Lord,
how majestic is your name in all the earth!
You have set your glory
above the heavens.
From the lips of children and infants
you have ordained praise
because of your enemies,
to silence the foe and the avenger.
When I consider your heavens,
the work of your fingers,
the moon and the stars,
which you have set in place,
what is man that you are mindful of him,
the son of man that you care for him?
You made him a little lower than the heavenly beings
and crowned him with glory and honor.
You made him ruler over the works of your hands;
you put everything under his feet:
all flocks and herds,
and the beasts of the field,
the birds of the air,
and the fish of the sea,
all that swim the paths of the seas.
O LORD, our Lord,
how majestic is your name in all the earth!
Psalm 8
8:30 PM
blessed.
