I'm just gonna blog a little before im gonna be cut off from cyber space for a whole week.
today was xsy mass briefing. got a lot gan chu about it. i always thought in not those who would be affected by who im pairing with and who are my group members. But reality is often hard. I was feeling so sucky when i got to know my group leader and member. No offence really, its more of a i-dunno-how-to-work-with-you feeling than a i-dun-wanna-work-with-you thing. Really, it's not anyone's fault. I believed jia mi jie and yanbing have worked their guts out trying to make the groupings work. And i know they've suffered a great deal. It's like ive been around and heard theories on how this service should be a faith stretching one, on how we shouldn't have personal expectations because its God's work. But when the groupings come, it comes straight in your face and its just impossible to hide how you feel. Then i begin to question my faith. I feel that i know and heard a lot, pure theories. I really wonder if someone points a gun at my head and asks if i love Jesus would i say yes. i would say yes, for now, but reality is so different from theories. please pray, pray for my faith and a heart that trusts God wholeheartedly without doubt.
im walking into another ominous cave tml. dunno what will it be like. dunno how far the path will take me. dunno if there'll be any pits in the midst. dunno whats gonna come.
please pray for strength, especially after this camp, to get ready for xsy, to get ready for God's work.
赐我信心宣告，在你凡事都能。
9:03 PM
blessed.
